Come What May, and Love It!

It's like Christmas time at the Packer home! My heart pounds like a child's does on Christmas eve. Only 15 days until the "big" Utah State Fair arrives!

It's hard not to make any assumptions or to create false hopes... I have learned, the hard way, that trying to force an outcome never works! To avoid the tedious predicament of "crying a river" and then "building a bridge to get over it", the formula to success is thus: "Come what may, and love it!".

Easier said than done? You ain't a kiddin'! How does one love humiliation, debt or failure?

Have you ever noticed that when you are on the brink of something big, (some life-changing discovery such as, "Hey, maybe I am worth it!") then is when the greatest opposition strikes?
Your faith is tried like a Native American on a journey to manhood!

I have a cousin-in-law who started her business about the same time I did. The results of our two year ventures are in. Business A: success! (major success) Business B: ummmm.... barely past the starting line. Can you guess which one is me?

On the way home from a gathering, the usual interrogation by well-meaning relatives began... "What will you do if this fair is a failure?" (Meaning, like the last 2 were?...) "How much are you willing to loose?" and, my personal favorite, "You might have to face the fact that in the real world, you have to get a 9 to 5 job like the rest of us."

No wonder only 1% of the population has all of the money; the other 99% have family like mine!

Never mind them, what really matters is that my Heavenly parents know what's best for me. I just have to put one foot in front of the other, in the darkness, and the light will follow. When I learn to stop judging my experiences "good" or "bad", I learn that I am safe in the hands of a loving God and that all things will work for my good in the end.

Everyday can be like a Christmas gift; and you, the excited child! Sometimes you receive socks... or a "wouldn't-be-caught-dead-wearing" hand knitted sweater from Great-Grandma Garden Gnome, or sometimes you receive a shiny new bike or a beautiful new dress that makes you feel like a princess!

The lesson: if you didn't get socks, you wouldn't have feet!

"I am still far from being what I want to be, but with God's help I shall succeed."

-Vincent van Gogh

(check out my work at http://www.meloniepacker.com)

Blowing Smoke?

Yes, Summerfest is now over with a grand total of 3 art prints sold. (One of which was to a supportive friend.)

Lets just say I know how Van Gogh must have felt when he said this:

"One may have a blazing hearth in one's soul and yet no one ever came to sit by it. Passers-by see only a wisp of smoke from the chimney and continue on their way."

-Vincent van Gogh

Years, months, days,... hours worth of planning and creating new art have passed and are gone. Was it a success? Was it all to no avail? No one yet knows.

How do you measure the worth of soul? Is it by the money she makes or the heads she turns? When value is over-looked, is value then lost?

In Bangkok, there is a small temple that encloses a large Buddha statue made of gold. Before 1957, the statue was only known to be made of clay and remained that way for several hundred years. It was only until the clay cracked under immense stress that it's true value was revealed.

For many years, I have thought myself the value-less clay statue. Chiseling away the hardened mask continues to be a difficult task. I struggle to hold on to the hope that I might be made of gold on the inside as I put myself on display.

"Why does it matter", some might ask, "that your art didn't sell?"

Answer: It doesn't. It only matters what I think of myself and whether I am making a difference in this world.

A lighthouse can never see the many weary travelers it has brought home until the light of the dawn hits the harbor at the end of the storm. My goal was to be a light in the storm for the passers-by... That, through my passion for color and child-like play, I could bring a smile to the faces of those who would stop. That through my courage to shine, others might too.

In that, I believe I have succeeded. I have found my direction and have rededicated my efforts... I raise my head, that was hung in defeat, and smile. I will try even harder next time. For, to me, it is not just art; it is following my God-given destiny to brighten up this world and help others find joy in living in the moment.

Though my dreams have not yet taken flight the fire in my heart will continue to burn... For all you weary passers-by, come, stay awhile and partake of it's warmth!

(check out my work at http://www.meloniepacker.com)

There was a princess once...

There was a little princess, once, who lived not very long ago. She was a good princess who was talented and very beautiful. Her father had entrusted her with a brilliant flame she carried with her everywhere she went. All the kingdom admired and adored her and her flame...

In the middle of the night, her precious flame was stolen and smothered and the princess was thrown into the kingdom's dungeon. The poor, little princess was left alone and scared in the dark. Afraid that someone would recognize her without her lost flame, she tore her dress into rags, ratted her hair and smeared her face with mud. The other prisoners began to taunt and hiss at her and she began to believe the things they said were true...

One day, the King came looking for his daughter amongst the foul-mouthed prisoners. When the little princess heard of his arrival, she hid herself because she was embarrassed of what she had (or had not) become. From that day forward, she vowed to herself that she would never give up until she had found a way to reignite the flame and become the queen she was destined to be!

Have you ever noticed how brainwashed we are to stay in our poverty?

It seems we are literally programed at a young age to stay confined in tight little dungeons called "the money game". Meanwhile, a small percentage of us continue to monopolize all the success and prosperity. We limit ourselves. We are essentially like eagles who have clipped their own wings and therefore have sabotaged their great potential.

Think about it... You've probably heard most of these sayings:

• "Money doesn't grow on trees"


• "A bad penny"


• "Filthy rich"


• "Money is the root of all evil"


• "Break the bank"


• "Another day, another dollar"


• "The rich get richer and the poor get poorer"


• "The idle rich"

...Honestly the list could go on and on!

I was exhausted by a conversation that took place in my own home. Someone very dear to me proudly announced his declaration to stay at a $37,000 yearly income. I understood his concern; which was that the more successful he got in a business or company, the more demands on his time. Unfortunately, his logic was skewed. He had painted a picture in his mind of what it meant to be wealthy. Stressed, grumpy, overworked, selfish...

I fear this is a similar perspective on which most people found their beliefs. (Otherwise, more of us would be rich!) They appear to humble themselves in their poverty; yet, in their pride they are shortchanging not only themselves but God and others by withholding their potential to do much more good in the world! I am reminded of a wonderful quote:

"Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be?

You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people wont feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do.

We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It is not just in some of us; it is in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others." (Quoted by Nelson Mandela, Marianne Williamson -A Return to Love)

It saddens me that so many of us have heard this quote and understood it yet we feed on the negativity we create for ourselves and are,therefore, unwilling to sacrifice what mistakenly makes us feel comfortable!

What my friend didn't understand is that money doesn't have to equal time, and values do not have to be sacrificed in order to become wealthy. These are old beliefs that reek of self deprivation and mediocrity. Some of the best people I know had to establish themselves beyond "financially secure" before they could become the people they became. Many great things were done by poor people; and many more were done by those that could afford to serve.

I made a covenant with an awkward little girl, once, that I would no longer repress her greatness and her light. There was a lot to be overcome...and a lot, still, that has to be uncovered. Searching for a stolen self-worth on a journey of healing is no easy task. However, I have committed to this journey, not only for the benefit of the little girl, but for the benefit of the world! There was a princess once...who is on her way to becoming a queen!

(check out my work at http://www.meloniepacker.com/)