Before the Fair:
Everything worked itself out smoothly before the day we were to "open for business" at the State Fair. Even the things that previously would have seemed a near impossible feat didn't stress me out so much this time. We started out $500 short for the booth fee and without a truck to transport our store to Salt Lake! Our enlarged photos that we displayed for sale didn't even arrive at our home until the day before we were to leave... Talk about cutting it close!
Yet, somehow, I maintained a calm demeanor. I knew I was meant to be at that fair; therefore, I knew everything would work out... and it did! Irreplaceable friends and family lent us the money and provided the supplies and babysitting we needed. We were on our way!
At the fair:
Butterflies churned in my stomach as my old nemesis, Fear, tried to conquer me again. However,... the weather was perfect! It may seem like a small thing to have the sun smiling down on you; after all, it's not an unusual event, but I had prayed and prayed it would work out that way after our first "flash flood" experience at Summerfest. My faith swelled inside me... I knew this was going to be a great 2 weeks!
We sold an average of 5 Pieces a day that first 4 day weekend. I was confident that was a great start! Nonetheless, nervousness crept in as the weekdays arrived... David was to head back home to the kids and his job while I manned the booth alone for the 10 to 12 hour days. I ate only the best of foods... potato chips, PB&J's, fruit snacks, apples and peanuts; I was near starving!!! Yet, I was bound and determined to hit the "break-even point" before I allowed myself to spend any of my earnings.
I don't think I sold anything that Monday and Tuesday. It got harder and harder to have faith in myself by the time mid-week came. Wednesday, my brother-in-law tried to commit suicide. Doctors told the family they didn't know if he would live or die. For 24 hours I stayed by the phone, completely distressed about where I should be while this was happening. I prayed and prayed. He was okay.
Just when I thought I had had enough, another internal conflict arose with the arrival of my parents. I hadn't seen or talked with them for some time and I definitely didn't expect them there then! My parents have a way of making me lose all my personal power and I felt like a child again. Though it was good to bring up some things that had been weighing on me, I could have thought of countless other places I would have liked to have the discussion!
Finally, by Thursday, I was in tears. The stress was overwhelming and the sells were barely existent. I prayed again with all the faculties of my heart. I knew that I couldn't do this myself any longer...
God sent me my long lost friend. A friend that I had adored as a teenager and young adult; my dear friend and the only person I could count on to make me laugh EVERY TIME! I knew that was a direct blessing from Him because that laughter carried me on until my sweet David arrived. That hope that God was still hearing me and cared is the same hope that saved me.
Now, this could possibly be a testimony to all those who question the part of a positive attitude when it comes to sales, because as soon as my husband showed up with his faith in my work, and me and my insecurities backed off, we started to sell again! By the time we packed up for home, we had sold 50 pieces of art. Now, this being a new business, our expenses were quite high and we didn't make back what we'd put into it like I had imagined, over and over in my mind...
All and all, though, I would call our endeavor quite successful! Though, I didn't sell as many art pieces as my cousin-in-law sells diaper bags, I learned a valuable lesson:
"If you hear a voice within you say, 'You cannot paint', then, by allI find that I am battling only my own "greatness". I was humbled by the almost constant compliments of successful artists. They each told me that I "had something" and that I should never give up or allow someone (myself included) to tell me that I wasn't going to make it... They said that I was great. I received some self-esteem; what more success could I have wished for? Now I only have to believe in myself!
means, paint... and that voice will be silenced!"
-Vincent van Gogh
(check out my work at http://www.meloniepacker.com)
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